Archive by Author | Norma

Homemade Ornament Blessings

Was not expecting this.  Just a cold icy end to Thanksgiving weekend.  A good day to put up the tree with Christmas music playing in the background.  Just like dozens of years before.  Where once it was accompanied by tons (seemed like tons) of children, helping, laughing, fighting,  it is now peaceful and quiet.  Funny, that does not bother me.  All my children and grandchildren live fairly close and I see them often and talk to at least one  of them everyday.   I am never lonely or miss my children, they are still a huge part of our lives.  Actually, the biggest part of our lives.

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So why are these tears falling down my cheeks?  As I strategically place each ornament on the branches, just like in years past, my favorite ones, the homemade ones, receive the places of honor, front and center.  They are the ones made of construction paper and yarn, popscicle sticks and glue.  A school picture adorns the front and “To Mom and Dad” or “MaMa and PaPa” is written on the back.  They are priceless to me, probably some of the most precious things I own.  They take me back in time like nothing else.  It isn’t the pictures of my children, the ones twenty-five years plus that get to me the most.  It is the ones of my oldest grandchildren, Lexi, Brett, Kyson and Bryce.  Seeing the pictures of them when they were two or three years old, I pause and realize I now have strong hints of the adults they will become. 20151129_132957 They are such sweet, good kids.   That cute little girl is now less than a year away from the age I was when I got married.  The other night she curled up to PaPa on the couch and had a heart to heart with him about boys and life and later told her Mom, “PaPa gives good advice.”  The three boys, who range in age from almost 16 to just turning 13, have been best friends all their life.  Now they are way taller then me and their deep voices startle me when they speak.  All three of them are here in an instant if Grandma calls and says we need help.  They have cleaned out the chicken house and goat barns for us, helped mulch the gardens, hauled bales and bales of hay, cleaned the shop, and helped put brakes on semi-trucks.  I don’t know what we would have done without their help butchering chickens, turkeys and rabbits this past year.  They are all great kids, going through the usual ups and downs of teenager-hood, but I know, just like the toothless grins smiling at me from the decades old ornaments, these kids will make it to adulthood with strong character, strong faith and a deep love and appreciation for the blessing God gave them with this big extended family.  And I love them, and I’m grateful, and I’m a little sad that maybe I haven’t appreciated it enough.  I make a vow that I will start right now, even as I know life will once again take over and get in the way, and I will make the same vow a year from now.  But, I know it’s OK and I am overwhelmed with the feeling of being blessed.  And I continue to put ornaments on the tree, and I smile, and another tear slips down my cheek.

I didn’t think I cared, until she was forgotten.

Through storms and over rainbows

There are so many times I’ve come to write, so many times I’ve wanted to, but the words just don’t come. Why? Because there are no words that can even come close to explaining this pain. No words that can make anyone who has never been through it understand.

Everything should be different. Nothing that is happening in our life right now should be, because we should have a 5 month old baby in our arms. We should not be wanting for a baby, hoping every month and being disappointed month after month after month. None of this should be happening! But it is and it makes losing our daughter so much harder and the healing so much longer. Everyone else has moved on, it’s a distant memory to them, to us it was yesterday. The memories of her face, the feeling of her in our hands, the smells of…

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21 And Counting

Right after our morning chores, just like every morning, Mark and I walked out to the shop, started a fire in the wood stove and made a pot of coffee.  We are never alone for long,  our son Bryan and other employee Nathan join us and soon the truck drivers show up with the first trucks to be serviced.  We have an assortment of chairs circling the wood stove and everyone visits for a few minutes and drinks a cup of coffee before the guys start their day and I head back to the house.  I had just settled down with my coffee in one of the rocking chairs when my phone rang.  It was our youngest child, son Kyle, calling to say he and his wife Dani were at the hospital, she was dilated to an 8 and they wanted to know if I could come take pictures.  Of course I said I was on my way, I just hoped I made it in time as the hospital was over thirty miles away and we had received more snow overnight.  After getting instructions from Mark about driving on the snowy roads and Bryan pretty much telling me I was an idiot for going on these roads (He does not understand the necessity of a grandmother seeing her new grandchild at the soonest possible moment) I headed north.  Here’s a picture of the roads I slowly drove on:

snowy roadI didn’t speed because I knew that would make me an idiot, but I sure prayed I would be on time.  I needn’t have worried.  As they sometimes do, the epidural slowed things down, and even though I got to their room about 8:30, the new little Miss wasn’t born till 3:15 in the afternoon.  But I didn’t mind.  It was nice to have nowhere to go and have nothing to do but sit and visit and catch up with one another.  Here she is, brand new Ella Kay, about five minutes old:

EllaAnd here is the happy family, joined by new Big Brother Noah.  Yes, she was grandbaby #21!  But it never gets old.  In the blink of an eye, you meet a new person and you can no longer imagine life without them.  God is Soooooo Good!

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What Are You Doing To Her?

We have one turkey hen named Gertie who just loves us.  She follows us everywhere we go.  This weekend Mark did some much overdue trimming on Liddy the goat’s hoofs.  As usual Gertie was right there by our side.  She got her face right down by the action as if to ask, “What’s going on?  What are you doing to her?

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Snowy Chores

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Even though it takes forever to get all my clothes on, to walk through the drifts, to break all the ice, to haul extra straw, etc, etc, etc………………there is just something very fulfilling about doing chores in the snow and cold.  Making sure the animals have plenty of food and water and a warm dry place to stay just gives me the warm fuzzy’s.  It is one of my favorite things to do!  In fact it is on days like this when I linger a little longer, talk to each animal, stop to pat a head, gaze on the mamma’s and babies, look out on the beautiful white scene around me and listen to the silence.  God is good!

New Babies!

Last July when Mark and I were feeding, he made the comment, “I didn’t know Rambo wasn’t cut!”  I said, “No, he isn’t.”  You see we had gotten Rambo, a little male lamb, at the Amish Chicken Auction a couple-of-months earlier, planning on raising him to butcher.  Mark thought he had been castrated and I guess he finally got a behind-the-scenes view of him and realized he was still “intact.”  He then said, “Let’s see if we can find some little ewe’s for him and we’ll raise our own lambs to butcher.”  Well, I was all over that!  In less than a week I had some found and off we went.  We ended up with six young ewe’s and of course, Rambo in our little flock.  Our efforts paid off – two days ago we went out to feed and this is what we found:

20150225_072529  Two adorable little girls!  Last night, the temperature was supposed to get down into the single digits, so Mark and I separated the other Mamma who was close to lambing and put her into the shed alone.  Sure enough, when I opened the door this morning, look what was waiting for me:

20150227_084200Two little bucks!  How fun is that?!?  No other mamma’s look close so we will have to wait for the rest of the gang to come along, but we have other newbies coming to make the wait go quicker.  Our goat Liddy should have her babies sometime in the next couple weeks and most important of all, grandbaby number 21 is due any day!  That should keep me occupied for awhile!

Away for the Season

It is January 22nd.  And I just took down my Christmas tree.  I wanted to take it down sooner, but the end of the year/beginning of the year book work for our business just didn’t let me get to it.  Today was the first time I’ve been caught up on all the paperwork so I tackled getting the tree down along with all the stockings and all my manger scenes.  Which got me to thinking…

Since we gave up buying our big family Christmas gifts and go on a “Family Fun Day” instead, I always contemplate not putting the tree up.  I mean after all, a Christmas tree with no gifts under it seems empty as can be.  But, so far, I still put it up, and once I do, I’m really glad I did.  Every morning, the first thing I do when Mark and I walk into the living room with our cup of coffee, is plug the tree in.  The white twinkling lights just add a warm glow to the room.  I notice each little ornament that represents a different interest in my life.  There are chicken ornaments, tractor ornaments, lots of snowmen (I love snowmen) and others given to me by my children or dear friends and even ones I just purchased at one of Mark and I’s many garage sale runs.  My all time favorites will always be the ones made by my children when they were little.  popsicle sticks made into a red sleigh, paper Santa Claus’s with cotton ball beards, and now my grandchildren are adding to that collection!  Each year I get a homemade ornament from one of more of them.

But once Christmas is over, for sure New Years Day, I no longer plug the tree in.  I no longer wish to see the warm glow from the twinkling lights.  That tree that brought me such joy for a month or so, is all of a sudden an eye-sore.  It is a reminder of yet another thing I need to do.  I’m done with it!  Which like I said, got me to thinking – that’s kind of the way we treat baby Jesus isn’t it.  We take Him down for a month, let the celebration of His birth bring us joy.  We let His light bring a warm glow to us and hopefully to others through us.  We get mad that people say Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas, we sing songs about Him and what He means to us, we give gifts in His honor.  And then January rolls around, and all of a sudden we are done with Him.  He becomes another reminder of something else we need to do.  (I really should start reading my bible.  I should send a card to that person.  I shouldn’t talk about this but…)

I think I need a reminder.  I think I’ll change one of my decorations

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